Thursday.

Yesterday sprinkled a glimmer of hope
I felt like, perhaps, I've started to cope
I floated a little, things felt lighter
A little like happiness, life was brighter

But it soon came crashing down
My smile turned into an ugly frown
A bit too good to be true it seems
That this short smile no longer beams

I tried. I really did. I actually felt proud
I could tell everyone about it, be really loud
That things were starting to turn
That my insides no longer ache and burn

But it came and went quicker than lightening
And my chest is now back to tightening
My heart is heavy again, my brain full
I'm so fed up of this, it's taking its toll

I'm not sure how much of this I can take
Of feeling on edge before I fully break
Should I stay or should I flee
Thinking about what's best for me
But with so many what ifs either way
I need to find a way to be okay

But I need more than okay infact
I want my heart wholly in tact
I want it feeling full and bursting
To think of me, to be fully immersing

I really wish I could rewind life a bit
Where things were slowly starting to fit
I was resting, taking things very slow
And naturally I was able to let things go
It honestly felt like I was healing
And things weren't quite so heavy feeling

I can only hope that this soon will pass
That things will be clear like a piece of glass
And one day I'll just know what to do
That I'll feel good again, happier too.